Things are changing for me

Ok so things haven't been so great with me for quite some time now. I have a lot of inner demons that I am trying to work through but it is a long hard process.
So basically, I am shutting my facebook page down, I will be keeping myspace for now but only to make sure I dont lose contact with the more important people who live too far away for me to see.
I just dont want to be associated with a site that is so interested in how popular you are and how f****ing good you look in your pictures, it makes me sick.

I am trying to get back into my drawings but it is hard. I have spent far too long worrying about pleasing other people that I have lost myself. I gained weight (which I loathe), I stopped drawing cause I dint feel like I was worth anything and therefore felt like my art wasnt worth anything either.
I stopped writing and pretty much stopped sleeping regularly. Even now when I do sleep I disturb the one person I truly love and it is hurting our relationship.
So basically I want to distance myself from superficial things and concentrate on what it really important.

I will be drawing more and I plan on uploading new things here but it may take some time, so for those that still watch me please be patient. I am learning to like myself again and also my art, so that I can show you all something that hopefully you will like too.

One last thing, I just want to thank Jules for all the kind words and support she has given me since I joined here. You are a star and I know you will get everything you want, Thank You

"Those who mind don't matter, but those who matter don't mind"
I need to remember this on a daily basis and I am sure I will get through.

So I have been thinking for quite some time now that i actually really miss letter writing. in essence i miss having pen pals, now you may think that that is a bit childish coming from someone who is nearly 24 but so what i miss it. I would also like to do something about it, so I put to all dA users out there who may read this would you be interested in having a penpal? I am happy to write to pretty much anyone, I would however be really interested in having a penpal from another country who could teach me something about where they live and their language and customs etc (i live in england) I don't currently speak any other languages except for a faint understanding of some german (the last time i took languages was in school about 9 years ago ) but i am very willing to try and learn So if there is anyone out there who thinks they might be intersted just comment on this journal or send me a note and i will get back to you as soon as i possibly can.

(please note even though i do enjoy spending time on my computer i am not looking for someone to email, i actually want to hand write real letters!)

I look forward to hearing from you all, all assuming anyone else is interested rachel

i'm not going to be on here for a few weeks. i am going to be working solidly on getting some new pieces done to go in my gallery as i have some time spare. which for me is a great rareity, so im using every minute of it that i can i want to take a minute to thank angelusnoir for the help on visual journals, hopefully i should have some interesting stuff to show you soon
i hope all of you are ok, see you in a few weeks

i'm not going to be on here for a few weeks. i am going to be working solidly on getting some new pieces done to go in my gallery as i have some time spare. which for me is a great rareity, so im using every minute of it that i can i want to take a minute to thank angelusnoir for the help on visual journals, hopefully i should have some interesting stuff to show you soon
i hope all of you are ok, see you in a few weeks